⚡ BREAKING: LOCAL LEGEND LEVELS UP ⚡

YOU'RE 9!

Scientists confirm: Zane is now 9 years old, which is roughly 3,287 days of being awesome, 0 days of being boring, and 1 very important day of eating cake. 🎂⚽

Balls dropped: 0  ·  Balls kicked: 0
▼ scroll for the good stuff ▼

EA SPORTS FC 26 — ULTIMATE BIRTHDAY TEAMNew Card Unlocked!

99
ST
🎂 ⚽
ZANE
99PAC
99SHO
98PAS
99DRI
12BED
99PHY
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

PLAYSTYLES+

  • 🍰 Cake Finisher+Never misses a slice from inside the box.
  • 🩴 Sandal SprinterElite pace, even in flip-flops.
  • ☝️ Point & ShootPoints at things. Then scores.
  • 😴 Bedtime NegotiatorBED stat: 12. Refuses to go.
  • 🎮 Controller WizardPro at FC 26. Beats Dad (often).
👆 tap the card to flip it!

📋 OFFICIAL SCOUT REPORT

Name: Zane "The Birthday Boot"

Age: 9 (just upgraded from 8)

Club: Wherever the cookies are

Strengths: Speed, skills, smiles, and pointing at famous jerseys.

Weaknesses: Bedtime. Vegetables. Honestly that's it.

Transfer value: PRICELESS (not for sale, Arteta asked).

SIGN HIM NOW

BREAKING NEWS FROMChuffsters

POW!
WOW!
Chuffsters in an Arsenal kit, pointing seriously
LISTEN UP, EVERYBODY... ZANE IS A COOL DUDE! AND THAT'S WORTH WAY MORE THAN A $300 BALL! 😎

BIRTHDAY BONUS LEVELPenalty Shootout

ZANE 0 – 0 DAD 🧤
Dad😬
DAD🧤🧤
👆 Tap anywhere in the goal to shoot!